Top 5 Pools at uOttawa

What!? There’s five pools at uOttawa? You didn’t know that? Well don’t worry. I’ll let you in on the loop. So here we are with The Top 5 Pools at uOttawa.

5. The Aquatic Centre

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Okay so you probably know about this one. This is the classic swimming pool in Montpetit. Bragged as an Olympic size swimming pool and being slick and pro. That may have been the case when it was made half a century ago but today it’s more of a windowless bunker than a place to relax. I got a whole list of problems of this pool but this isn’t the Top 10 Problems with The Aquatic Centre. No, this is Top 5 Pools at uOttawa, so let’s move to the next pool.

4. The pool in the Bio-sciences Building

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A pool in the bioscience building you ask? Well yea, located on the ground floor near the entrance is a pool called the “Aquarium”. Though the size may be a bit small I’m sure it could still fit a dozen students if you sardine them in. If there may be days when you just want to scream at the world and freak out, then the aquarium might be a good place to go. It can be quite relaxing to watch these peaceful fish swim circles in their small confined lives. They look happy as they live without purpose trapped in the small cage. So why can’t we be happy with our freedom. There’s more to life outside of failing our classes at uOttawa.

3. The pool in the new STEM basement.

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Now it’s an old time joke to talk about the secret pool in the basement but there really is a pool in the STEM basement. It’s a small pool exclusive to those weird engineering students who study fluid dynamics. Yep, this pool is the water tank in the fluid labs. A little too small to swim in, or do anything at all. But I can assure you that the flow of water can go up to an impressive 0.00348 m^3/s.

2. The pool in the washroom in the library

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One late night when I was studying in the library I had to use the washroom. The smell was the first thing I noticed as I opened the door. Next was the sight. Coming from the stall was a puddle- no a pool of shit and other fluids I’d rather not know. Yes there is a pool in the library and it’s in the washroom, especially during exam times. I wouldn’t bring my swim-suit for this, a hazmat-suit would be better suited.

1. The pools in 1848

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These two pools will show who is a real athlete and who is not. Let me tell you, the competition is fierce. This is a tough pool to stay afloat in. I always find myself always drowning…. in my beers… and debt…. Anyways, if you suck at swimming then at least these pool tables are waiting for you to show your skills. Or maybe this pool isn’t for you either. Well I got one last bonus for you…

Bonus Pool

uOttawa itself is a pool of depression. Between juggling the next overdue assignment, the upcoming midterm that you haven’t studied for, the bad grade you just received on the other midterm, the cold weather, the sleepless nights, another crap shawarma meal, the lack of pools at uOttawa. It’s no wonder my sorrow is a pool of tears that I’m drowning in.

The good news is that the only actual pool in Montpetit just added new backstroke ledges. Just gotta focus on the positives and keep swimming.